Saturday, 6 October 2012


There are times when one can not distinguish between reality and fantasy. When the brain refuses to accept the truth that is too cruel, that's the moment of the other side of the brain creates an illusion that is believed to be the true truth as his alibi. And the way out of the imaginary world but to disillusion yourself that it's time to wake up.

Today, the sky showed arrogance in the dark, without moon and star as a companion. Slow, rintikan by rintikan drizzle rained down from the still dry land. The longer rintikan rainfall even more rapid. Occasionally augmented enough voice deafening thunder.

In the back room window, staring at Yoona sat dazed natural events that are going on out there. Some relied on his white sofa made exclusively by the window. His eyes showed that he was thinking something. And it was not enough to bother until he finally fell asleep at eleven o'clock. Light knock on the door, dreaming membuyarkan Yoona.

"You're still up?" Asked Yuri, eonninya, which runs near and bring a glass of hot chocolate.

"To My?" Yoona response without answering inquiries immediately eonninya and sip a glass of chocolate milk.

"Go to bed earlier. Did not we have the promise of tomorrow with Choi Doctor? "

Yoona put empty glass while glass table near the sofa. "Why should I always find that Choi Doctor? Every time to meet her, she is always asking strange thing. As if I am suffering from abnormality of the soul. Eonni, I am sane. Why eomma Eonni took command there? Is there anything wrong with me? Am I not okay? "Tone discretion Yoona transformed into high, even his face flushed as emotional withstand rumble in his chest.

He never thought exhausted. Why a few months anyway, exactly two weeks. Every two days once he had found the Doctor Choi, whose work is a psychiatrist. But all this time he felt he was not sick, does not behave in strange, does not look like someone who is experiencing severe depression.

"The meaning and Eonni eomma not. Only, for this you can fall asleep fall asleep rarely seen. Maybe after a little talk with Doctor Choi, you can feel improvements. Do not you own that said, after drinking a potion from Doctor Choi, you can feel more relaxed before going to bed? "

Yoona was quiet. She knows, it's no use replying to all the words eonninya or eommanya, if eommanya also be here. They will use a thousand excuses way to reassure that all is to its advantage. But deep in his heart, he felt there was something strange. There is something that is covered by everyone from himself.

And all took place since he had an accident two months ago. At that time he was with namjachingunya, Donghae. They had just returned from a friend's birthday party in a torrential rain. The speed of their car in the street is quite high, even when the corner, they do not in the least fast. Until finally, they could not avoid the car when they drove fast and crash into the road divider.

But Yoona remembered no serious wounds they experience. Only a few minor wounds to the head and hands. Perhaps more seriously wounded Donghae, head produce enough blood. But, after being treated at a hospital a few days, the wound began to heal and allowed to leave the hospital.

Yoona took a deep breath, turned her head back facing the window. Was it because of the accident, every night sleep always restless and suffer from nightmares?

"Yoong, sleep. It's late, "coaxing Yuri, Yoona interesting side arm and led him walking toward the bed.

After ensuring that Yoona was already taking the drug given and slept snooze Doctor Choi, Yuri turned off the lights and walked out of room. Shortly before he shut the door, she muttered to herself plan, "Eonni hope you'll soon wake up from this nightmare."

• • • • •

Just two hours Yoona dozed in his sleep soundly enough, lightning voice out there again thundering voice deafening. Terloncat girl woken up. Fear clearly visible on his face pale and her heart beat irregular. Some cold sweat dripping on his shoulders.

With half a heart, he dragged the blanket that covers her whole body to the side. It's like if it wakes up like this, with anything as strong as he tries, it is impossible for him to fall asleep again in the near term. And back in the habit.

If already awakened nightmare because the voice or lightning, he would imprison her on the sofa by the window. Looking beyond the wet streets by rain. Let the silence of the night to accompany him. Knees, leaning on the ditekuknya, Yoona took the phone from the side table. No incoming calls. No new posts in your inbox. Then, throw the phone is with regret towards the bed.

It's been two weeks, Donghae did not give the news. In fact every time called, who answered only the voice box. Already tens and hundreds of messages Yoona send message he left on the voice box Donghae. However, even if the owner does not respond.

Last time met Yoona Donghae Donghae at the time was waiting for the bus at the stop. Namja that always forget to bring an umbrella, but now this is the rainy season. And every time that, Yoona will bring an umbrella and let Donghae they delivered to your home.

The distance between his house and the house hooked Donghae only three roads. Sometimes, if Donghae did not have a meeting in the office, he would wait at the bus stop and Yoona together back home. Talk about simple things and not important. Joking laughter with everything they encounter along their journey home.

Yoona hugging her knees close second. Every time she thought about Donghae, who knows why his heart like a knife being chipped. It feels very painful. Until he trouble breathing and could not resist tears. A feeling as if he could not meet Donghae again.

"Oppa ... You're where? Bogoshipo ... "

• • • • •

A few seconds later, the phone Yoona thrown on the bed rang. The girl stood up and walked towards the bed to see who menelponnya. What Donghae? When looking at the name that appears on the screen of your phone, Yoona can not afford to hide his happiness. Immediately he answered the call. Regret and anger that kept suddenly disappeared somehow moves.

"Yeoboseyo. Oppa ... You again at? "Yoona said with cheerful tone as she rested herself on the bed.

"I'm still at the bus stop. Just finished a meeting. "Donghae sounded pretty tired voice on the other side. Several times he sighed long and heavy.

"At the bus stop? Oppa forget to bring your umbrella again? "Yoona raise her and walked back to the window.

Rain out there remains unresolved. Even more rapid. Several times showed flashes of lightning lit though not out loud rumble. However, Yoona have a feeling that this will be a long rain.

"That was in the morning, I was in a hurry to the office. Could you help me bring an umbrella? I beg you. "Now hear voices on the other side with a tone piteously.

Yoona eye balls rotate both up and down. Normally if one is thinking. Night was already late. And if he comes out now, it will definitely scolded eonninya. But he did not care. Intense nostalgia in his chest to give strength to deliver a double umbrella at Donghae. And he has committed.

"I'll be right over there now. Oppa should wait for me. "

Yoona has been almost half an hour waiting at the bus stop alone. The rains no longer heed him. Even the cool night wind blowing in cold blood. Yoona occasionally rubbing his hands on the loose side to the other arm. While the other hand holds an umbrella to fly close to not get carried away in the wind.

Then, removed the phone from his pocket pants length. Again and again he called Donghae, but not even namja replied. And every time Yoona hear the tape for him to leave a message, he shut down the call.

"Oppa you at?" She whispered slowly.

Yoona her seat on a bench at the bus stop is colored blue is. There is no indication that he will soon be back home before meeting with Donghae. Light blue colored umbrella held since last put to the side. Second knees folded. And head ditelengkupkan between the two knees.

Yoona actually do not want to cry. But there's something off in him that led him to cry. Slow tears went harder and harder. He knew he was falling into a huge hole. Everyone wants to help, but not to itself. Him feel more comfortable being in the dark and distant big hole rather than face a very painful reality.

At the end of the road, running a small girl holding an umbrella. Wet behind the body Sekujur due to rain splash during the run. The girl started to slow down when approaching footsteps to the bus stop.

"Yoong Yoona-ya ...... ....." call girl while her brother body shook.

Yoona tilting his head up, looking into both eyeballs Yuri. No single fact that she uttered. Through Yoona on his gaze, Yuri could feel what was felt to his brother. Intense pain to lose someone very loved.

There was little thought that approaching thoughts. Is Yoona already remember everything? What if Donghae Yoona already know .....

"Can I stop discover Doctor Choi?" Yoona asked suddenly with vigor while erasing the tears from both cheeks.

Yuri startled by the sudden question. He was not able to properly digest the intention behind the question. Until finally he could only stand and fall silent.

Seeing no response whatsoever from the eonninya, Yoona resumed, "I feel more and more often I find Doctor Choi, then shadow Donghae oppa is getting away from me. Maybe Donghae oppa felt jealous because I'm often met with Doctor Choi. Yes, definitely so. Sure he was jealous that is why he did not call or look for the. He ..... "

Yuri gradually begin to understand the essence of the word Yoona. He tried to cut his brother before the hearing of the word evolved into an absurd proceeding. It is time to end this farce. Despite the fact that he said this program could be hurting Yoona. Harm him better now than let Yoona hurt himself for life. A sister very modest expectations. Just wanted to see his brother laugh every minute, not leaving it crying every moment.

"Donghae was dead." With all the determination in the liver, Yuri tell the truth that is hidden by all these years. "She passed two months ago because of the accident. You want to lie to yourself, how long? "Asked Yuri which are not able to handle his emotions.

"I did not take it anymore Yoong. You know how it hurt my heart every time I saw you steal crying every night? Behaving like Donghae still live each day? Talks about himself as if he is still with us. And every time it rains, you always bring an umbrella and waiting at the bus stop until the morning. Why should delude yourself, but deep down in your heart you know that most Donghae is dead? "

Yoona was dumbfounded. She never thought that eonninya capable of producing words like bullets penetrate her ulu right. He wants to deny that Donghae was gone. That all but a lie that was written eonninya. Unfortunately, he was not able to utter a word. Because that's the truth that is being covered himself.

For this he composed another permission to close the real truth. Donghae safe from accidents that time. Successfully saved his life in the hospital, when in fact Donghae died on the way to the hospital.

He also always create an environment where Donghae was still with him. Every morning to call her to say good morning. Every day never forget to remind her lunch. Every night to sing a song that they delivered to dreamland. And every rain, will ask him to bring an umbrella, waiting at the bus stop. All that is done just to trick nature Yoona under sadarnya if Donghae is gone for good. He does not mind living in this lie as long lifetime Donghae always with him.

"Yoona-yes sadarlah, Donghae was not there. Eonni sadarlah beg. "Yuri Yoona shook shoulder plan to end her body hug his brother who was sitting like a statue with a blank stare.

"Eonni ......" Yoona eonninya a voice call is so slow. "I would rather lose all things in this world. But, I could not and can not lose Donghae oppa. No, Eonni ... "Slow down, drop by drop Yoona tears flowing from his eyes wrapper. "I would rather live in this lie. Really. So please do not ever wake. I would not be willing to live with this sesakit feeling. It feels better that I die than have to face the truth ... "

Strengthen her arms on Yoona Yuri. Maybe for now Yoona was not ready to come out of his imaginary world. But, he believes with all his heart that one day Yoona will leave a world filled with falsehoods and returned at himself and the world.

The day will soon arrive.


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